Is Having A Sugar Daddy Wrong?
Life is expensive. Everything costs money, and it seems as though The Powers That Be are hellbent on finding more things to charge us for. Soon we’ll be paying a tax every time we blink, mark my words.
Then there’s the matter of working for a living. I mean, who wants to do that when there’s another way?
What’s this other way, you ask. Well, bagging a sugar daddy, of course. A tried and tested method of getting the things you want when you get sick of the ol’ 9 to 5. If you’re a reasonably attractive woman, your ship may have come in.
What is a Sugar Daddy?
A sugar daddy is usually a wealthy, older man who likes to spend his money on younger women in exchange for their company. “Company” is open to interpretation; sometimes, but not always, this includes a relationship or sex.
Sugar daddies come in all shapes and sizes, and their requirements differ, too. For some men, especially those with loads of disposable income and no wife on whom to spend it, the mere chance of lavishing treats on any woman is a privilege to them.
Others might expect a little more bang for their buck (pun absolutely intended).
Ultimately, the woman decides what type of arrangement she’s comfortable with; if she isn’t interested in a physical relationship, she can specify this at the start.
Now that you know what sugar daddies are, let’s explore why some jealous concerned people think it’s wrong to have one.
It’s Prostitution by a Different Name
In some ways, having a sugar daddy is akin to being an escort. A woman can be wined and dined, taken to fancy places, or be given gifts and money by a man who wants his wicked way with her.
His wicked way, while it often doesn’t involve sexy time, still involves a woman making herself available to him for money. At face value, really no different from your garden variety escort.
Counter argument:
Except, well, it can be very different from regular escorting. There are many arrangements where the men simply want someone to talk to, and have never even met the women in person.
Also, the relationship between a sugar daddy and sugar baby (I really wish they’d change this term) is a little more personal than the bog standard, transactional one between call girls and johns. There’s usually a great deal of mutual respect between both parties; they’re practically best buddies.
It’s Unethical/Exploitative
The arguments surrounding the ethics of such an arrangement are focused on the exploitative nature of it. In the age of MeToo and women’s liberation, some women might see sugar daddies as representing everything that’s wrong with the patriarchal world.
Sugar daddies are a bit like puppetmasters, pulling the monetary strings and watching unlucky women dance and do whatever they want. Power and control.
If a woman had the means to pay for everything herself, would she even entertain some of these men? Well, probably not. Which means that she’s forced to do something she might not want to do for money, hence the exploitation angle.
Counter argument:
Put your hand up if you’ve ever worked a job you absolutely hated. I would need several pairs of hands myself.
The point being, we’ve all had to do things we despised just to pay the bills. We’ve worked for companies run by mega-rich dudes who didn’t give a damn about us, and would have paid us in Monopoly money if they could have. How is having a sugar daddy any different?
Yuck!
Not much of an argument, but this is the general feeling among those that don’t get it. Why would any man be desperate enough to do something like this?
There does seem to be an element of desperation to sugar daddying, which gives it an ick factor. If a man’s so wealthy he can splurge on a woman he hardly knows, there must be something wrong with him, right? He’s probably into some freaky stuff, like dressing up as an animal and using whips!
Counter argument:
It’s not as black and white as that. There are a number of reasons why a man would seek out a woman for her company, with no intention of dating or marrying her:
- he’s a widower who lost the love of his life and doesn’t want to “cheat on” her
- he’s successful and too busy to have a full-fledged relationship
- he has so much money, he doesn’t know how else to spend it
- he likes helping a damsel in distress
- he wants an easy life with no obligations
You have to understand the psychology of men to truly fathom why an arrangement like this would be beneficial to them. Men of means enjoy taking care of women. It’s equal parts power trip and the general nature of the male species. Spending money on women is what they were born to do.
It’s Dangerous
As with any relationship a woman enters into with a stranger, sugar daddying does have its dangers. It’s entirely possible for a man to lure an unsuspecting woman into his clutches, and take advantage of her.
Outside of that, the idea that women are supposed to be available whenever their sugar daddy wants them, does have a sinister feel to it. He, in a sense, controls her life; and for some vulnerable women, this could trigger past trauma.
There’s also the possibility that women end up becoming isolated from their disapproving friends and family, which makes them even more vulnerable to controlling, abusive men.
Counter argument:
The more savvy ladies have managed to circumvent the dangers by keeping their sugar daddies virtual, sometimes never meeting them in person. Others, though they do allow face-to-face meetings, always meet in public places, and never let the men know where they live.
These are just some of the safeguards employed by women who want to retain control. This kind of sugar baby is able to juggle two or more men at once, and bleed those wells dry without giving much of herself. Presidents and prime ministers could learn a thing or two from women like this.
Conclusion: So, is Having a Sugar Daddy Wrong?
Wrong for whom? That’s my question.
When two consenting adults enter into an arrangement, so long as they’re both of sound mind, aren’t under duress, and know exactly what is required of them, I fail to see the problem. The people who have a problem with this are those whose looks can only get them salt daddies!
Both parties are getting something valuable from the deal – if they weren’t, they wouldn’t agree to it. Women can get their bills paid, receive expensive gifts, be whisked away to exotic locations, while men are given a new lease of life by spending their remaining years in the company of attractive women.
Sounds like a good deal to me. Where do I sign up?
